


Monday, 6:30pm

by prokyon



Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: F/M, Gen, If you don't like Warstan you probably shouldn't read this, Sherlock isn't actually in it, they just talk about him
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-05
Updated: 2015-01-05
Packaged: 2018-03-05 14:08:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 861
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3123029
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/prokyon/pseuds/prokyon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John and Mary decide to see a counselor for the sake of their marriage. Even though the child is healthy, and one should assume that all is well, it isn't.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Monday, 6:30pm

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This fic is unbeta-ed, and English is not my mother language, so please forgive me mistakes of spelling, grammar and such.  
> I'm happy about feedback of any kind!

„He slept at our place last week. Twice.“

„It was for a case, Mary.“

„John, Dr. Madison gave _me_ the permission to talk. Please respect that.“

John sends a quick glance to Dr. Madison, who gives him a nod and smile, before he looks back to Mary. His wife is looking down on her hands, and he can see she's playing with the wedding ring. After a few seconds, she takes a deep breath and continues.

„I feel like we're having a polyamorous friends-with-benefits relationship, and I'm the one who's responsible for your benefits. You're constantly running off with him, in the middle of the night, you wake Sue up, and I'm the one who has to bring her back to sleep. It can't work like this. Sherlock can't sleep at our place at least twice every week, you can't continue neglecting your family like this. You have to be more of a father for Sue.“

Mary stops and looks him in the face, the first time since they came here. „You can't only be Dr. Watson. You have to be John, too.“

John nods – he knows it, of course he does, of course he wants to spend time with his daughter, of course he wants to be a father. But then there's Sherlock, who's a bloody prick and at the same time so vulnerable, so dependant. It isn't his fault that he only gets cases that he can't do all alone, can he?

„Mary, you know I love you deeply, and you also know I love Sue more than anything. I would never leave you. But Sherlock is hurt, and I'm his only friend. You don't know how he is, how he can be, how much he needs me-“

„Oh, I don't know? Then tell me. Tell me how much he needs you,“ she says, her voice as sharp as a blade.

Dr. Madison shuffles with some of her papers – it's one of her ways to get the both of them to talk calmer, she doesn't want to interfere in their „discussion“. Mary is much too aggravated by now to listen to some papers, though, and it's the same for John.

„I'm his only friend. I'm the one he relies on-“

„The people he relies on are his brother, his 'network', and Molly. She was the one he asked to participate in his faked suicide, did you already forget that?! You didn't want to see him for a month.“

„I - That was different. He can't take Molly to cases, or his brother, he takes me. I lived with him for years, hell, the tabloids even assumed we were in a relationship, and now you want to forbid me to see him?“ It's a genuine question. He isn't sure if Mary actually hates Sherlock by now, or if she still likes him, or if it's something in between.

„I don't want to forbid you to see him. I just wan't you to be more of the John you were, well...“ Mary's fingers start playing with her wedding ring again, as if she wasn't sure if she wants to keep it or throw it in the gutter. John feels sick.

„When he was still dead.“

To John, these words feel like a blade through his back, and he doesn't know what to say. Does she really want him to feel like he felt then? Like little parts of him got sucked in by a black hole, that he got chipped away, piece by piece, until there was nothing left?  
She can't, not really.

Can she?

 

Dr. Madison clears her throat. „John, how do you feel about that?“

How he feels? Betrayed. Hurt. Sent back to Leinster Gardens.

„I'm sorry, I shouldn't have- it wasn't what I meant. I'm sorry, I -“

„No, it's fine. Go on.“ John swallows and crosses his arms. Then he remembers that crossed arms are a sign for distance, and uncrosses them again.

Mary takes a shaky breath before she continues. It isn't easy for her, but that's how it is supposed to be. Marriage counseling shouldn't ever be easy, at least that is what John has heard.

"Back then - I know you felt vain and alone and dead, I didn't forget what you told me - you were more than just the Consulting Dedective's sidekick. You were - you."

That's what he is - a sidekick? He has felt like he was several times, but it hurts nevertheless, hearing it spoken out loud.

"So I'm going back to being a sidekick now." His voice his hoarse and he takes a sip of the glass of water in front of him.

"I- yes." The guilt is practically dripping out of Mary's voice, and John simoultaneously wants to cuddle her until she feels better and hurt her as much as she did.

Silence ensues, and after a few minutes, Dr. Madison talks again. 

"Maybe let's talk about that in another session?", she proposes, her voice soft and timid. Mary looks up and a sad smile stretches over her pale face.

"Yes, that probably would be for the best."

"John?"

He can't bring himself to fake a smile like his wife. "Yes. Next session."

 


End file.
